Thursday, June 17, 2010

Body Scan

Today I've gone missing.
I'm hiding in my body,
visiting all the hankerings
I never resisted.

A shrewd and small alien,
I furrow along wiry edges
where edible music
escapes like blood. 

I drain sacs of dark secrets,
splay upon the surface
of sentient cells,
pressing for answers.

I lodge in peevish crevices,
consort with membranes
too permeable 
to hold lies.


I surface to a d minor scale of skin
so tenderized by touch,
it no longer
covers dense, irregular issues.

I wrench through follicles
of foregone conclusions,
hear tiny trickles 
of truth broadcast 

on narrow bands
of breath.
I come clean about being
caught dead

in desires etched so deep
they invert.
Pain accompanies me,
points out the bone-on-bone grindage 
 
of missteps,  
shows me deposits of fear
where I've been disparaged
into bits.

Arriving at the place
where fantasies dislodge,
I spring open like laughter,
and settle

into myself.


Kathryn Feigal, 2010

© 2010 by Kathryn Feigal. All rights reserved. 



Unfathomable mind! now beacon, now sea.
Samuel Beckett

25 comments:

  1. This kicked me hard in the gut and knocked the wind out of me. I'm a bit fragile these days. I want to consort with the membranes too permeable to hold lies. I want to eat music, so to end the bone on bone grinding. This is perfectly brilliant, Kass.

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  2. stunning, just stunning.
    there is no better place to land than yourself. after all, where else could you be?

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  3. This is the best thing I've read in some time. Bone on bone, indeed.

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  4. Oh, The bone grindage, you hit a nerve.
    Well done!

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  5. Hadn't come across it before. Agree with "Once Known as the Badger" whole-heartedly.

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  6. a very powerful and touching post. A totally find myself in it!!

    Great Kass!

    loveNlight
    Gabi

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  7. A powerful post, Kass, especially against the back drop of how I imagine things are for you right now. Thanks.

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  8. Is there anything you can't do exquisitely?

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  9. I all too often crash land in the place where fantasies dislodge.

    Great poem.

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  10. I've been wondering how you are ... this gives me some idea.

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  11. so refreshing to come here and enjoy your poetry. aaaah.

    thanks for brightening my day.

    one love.

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  12. I've had to ruminate, grinding my teeth through the night. My body, that used to be so comfortable, is now the alien, gangly, bone grindy thing. Good one Kass.

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  13. Powerful and resonant for anyone who, for whatever reason, has direct experience of the fragility and mutability of the body.

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  14. Morning Kass! Just looking for Brenda Photo Challenge photos that you entered...Am I on the right blog?
    http://www.brendaphotochallenge.blogspot.com
    Let me know so the others can come see as well!
    Have a great day!
    Donna

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  15. I really enjoyed this poem, it strongly reminds me of one I wrote, "Body" which I am going to put in my blog.

    Today I have read in an Italian daily newspaper that M.Strand has won the Pulitzer Prize for poetry and I remembered you in that photograph in your blog with him.

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  16. LES - Thanks. Life registered in the body is a favorite theme for me.

    STANDING - Yes, but sometimes I land differently in my body than I want.

    JULIE - Yes, those Anatomy classes in Massage School paid off.

    BADGER - I thought you might get the double meaning there.

    NUMINOSITY - Good play on words.

    DAVE - You haven't come across it because I just wrote it. I have since clarified the confusion by adding my name to it. I suppose you thought Samuel Beckett wrote it. I should make that mistake more often.

    GABI - I'm glad you could relate to it.

    ELISABETH - I suppose there was some backdrop of that in there.

    MARIE - Thanks. I can name several things I do rather ineloquently.

    KIRK - Crash landing is better than not landing at all.

    SUSAN - Does it give you the idea I'm a little tired?

    SE'LAH - Thanks, I'm glad your day was brightened.

    TAG - Sorry about the bruxism.

    DICK - Mutability. Nicer word than crepitus.

    DONNA - I posted it on the 16th. Thanks for the good times on your blog.

    TOMMASO - I look forward to that poem.

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  17. A compelling use of language and a stunning poetic achievement.

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  18. Very creative. Transports me to many different places.

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  19. Yup, that does it for me.

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  20. How did you write this? The diction, the ending, the all of it? A masterpiece.

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  21. "I lodge in peevish crevices," - this is a truly brilliant line! Loved the whole poem but this got me good!


    Don't know how I've missed so many of your posts...you're on my roll but I've obviously got my eyes painted on!

    Hope you are well.

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  22. Your poem speaks volumes about life, learning and above all, letting go of our emotional garbage and becoming whole once more.

    This certainly cuts to the bone and is the best I have read in a long, long time.

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  23. I surface to a d minor scale of skin
    so tenderized by touch,
    it no longer
    covers dense, irregular issues.

    The best poetry has to offer. Brilliance!

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  24. Great poem. Fun! So good to know that others do mental gymnastics to understand and then accept themselves.

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It's nice to know you've stopped by. Thanks.